THE CREATIVITY OF THE MESS WE MAKE

My writing yet again (another part of the same chapter will be up in two-three days or something). I should add though, that while some of CotMWM is autobiographical (which of course is unavoidable and some of it so obviously is), this story is not about me.

"I have never been my able to picture myself in a relationship, a real one, with everything it entails and contains. The complete embrace of the other human being as a person, as the person I am with, the faults, the virtues, the bad sides, the good ones, the full acceptance of someone as that particular person, as an entity if you will, has never been something I can see myself do. Or: yes I can. I can see myself do it, but it would be a struggle, it would be me having to constantly suppress myself and most of all, my needs. Maybe this is because I’m 20 years old; I’m too young to have ever been with someone where you can exist as equals; maybe it will never come to me. Or perhaps I am not making sense at all; clarity is not for me. Confusion, contradiction is. This could maybe also be because of my age; maybe I will always be this way."

- The creativity of the mess we make, Julia Melin