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"On a different note, the author feels obligated to acknowledge that yes, the success of a memoir - of any book, really - has a lot to do with how appealing its narrator is. To adress this, the author offers the following:

a) That he is like you.
b) That, like you, he falls asleep shortly after he becomes drunk.
c) That he sometimes has sex without condoms.
d) That he sometimes falls asleep when he is drunk having sex without condoms.
e) That he never gave his parents a proper burial.
f) That he never finished college.
g) That he expects to die young.
h) That, because his father smoked and drank and died as a result, he is afraid of food.
i) That he smiles when he sees young black men holding babies.
One word: appealing.

- A heartbreaking work of staggering genius, Dave Eggers